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  • Writer's pictureEsmé James


Published in Lot's Wife, June 2020

I will hold you down

and carve letters into your skin

branding you 

with my poetry 

watching its meaning

seep into your body 

feeling my words 

poison your blood 

hearing your veins 

beat out of tempo

laughing as they burst 

tearing open your liver

consuming your lungs 

consonants and vowels

dancing on your bones

singing down your throat

suffocating you

stripping you naked

exposing you 

grinding you down

into the absence that I crave. 

I want nothingness to hold me.

crawling next to your ruins

I’ll blanket myself 

with severed limbs and torn flesh


in the pools of your blood

melting into your body

becoming one

I will find your lips 

amongst organs and entrails

kissing them lightly

telling them 

everything will be okay

and I will hold you

until your body rots

and blood congeals 

and I feel the words

once poems and meanings

turn to ashes

the scattered remains

of hands that were mine.  

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